Cruelty and violence.
Ever since I was a little kid, I've had a strong and very negative reaction when either of those two elements finagle their way into my sphere. I get angry when someone slips a barbaric detail into a story without warning. I suppose you can simply say I don't have the stomach for cruelty, whether the events are fictional or not.
Much like my copious spelling issues, I blame my creativity. My wild imagination, although sometimes amusing when scribing a hand written note sans spellcheck, can prove to be terrifying when exposed to a snippet of brutality. Images run amuck, the graphic event loops over and over, and God forbid I start filling in any blanks.
No bueno.
However, a few weeks ago, in a clear moment of insanity, I called up a friend of mine and asked if he wanted to see the movie Paul, the Apostle with me. In truth, Jim Caviezel is my favorite actor, and I was so excited that he had a new movie coming out that I completely overlooked the subject matter. My bad. Flash forward to the opening scene and I was already combating the urge to lose my lunch. I abruptly turned to my friend and said, "I can't do this."
I would have bolted, for real. The problem was (true to form) I surrendered my keys to said friend in the parking lot so I wouldn't have to carry a purse. My shiny little ring of allies were nestled in his far pocket, and although he is a close friend, I deemed it inappropriate to start digging in his pants without his consent, even if the theater was dark. He looked me in the eye and calmly said it would be ok and encouraged me not to leave, but I wasn't so sure. Even though I wasn't watching the screen, the violence was assaulting my senses. I could hear the sounds and knew enough about what was going on to get the nasty reel started in my head.
I was uncomfortable, restless, and edgy. I couldn't shut out the horrible events on-screen, and I thought I was going to lose it completely. I was starting to get irrationally angry. The worst part was, the events HAD happened. These barbaric and cruel events were not manufactured in someone's overactive imagination, but instead based on true events. I couldn't understand how people could watch, even if it was just a movie.
If I stay, there has to be a point, I thought. There has to be something really good at the end of this tunnel.
Fortunately, there was.
As the Christians were continually being slaughtered, there was a scene where Luke asks Paul what they should do. Luke told Paul the youth were itching to fight back with violence, but Paul made it clear that was not the answer.
Love is the answer. Only love.
And the thing is, he's right. Nearly two thousand years later, that same notion holds true, because you can't fix violence with violence. You can't right a wrong through payback or revenge.
I was reminded of a line in The Count of Monte Cristo where the priest tells the wrongly accused Edmund, "Do not commit the crime for which you now serve the sentence."
It is human nature to want to fight back and even the score when there has been an injustice, but how does that elevate the situation? Instead of lifting up and out of that bad situation, we are digging in. When we respond to violence with violence, or injustice with injustice, we are just turning the screw of hatred further into the ground, giving it a tighter hold. We are giving that weed roots, instead of pulling it out of the ground completely.
Much like my Friday night, life is notorious for throwing curve balls at us that we aren't prepared for. We can have moments, hours, months, even years of extreme discomfort. We can be teetering on the brink of losing our minds, but if we can scrounge together a little more endurance, I'm confidant it will be worth it in the end. Like the movie, there is always light to be found, always a lesson to be learned... if we are willing to search.
I started to think about the current state of our world and even more so, the current state of our country. We are bombarded with images, stories, and realities of violence and hatred... Every. Single. Day. Another school shooting, another abusive parent, a wounded country divided so deeply on politics. Everyone claims to speak the truth, but nothing reconciles. We have an insatiable need to be right, to prove our point, and be validated. But at what cost?
Abraham Lincoln once said, "A house divided against itself cannot stand." Where do you think Abe got that bright idea?
Don't pass out folks, this Catholic girl is about to quote the bible.
In Matthew 3:24-27, Jesus states, If a kingdom is divided against itself, it cannot stand. If a house is divided against itself, it cannot stand. And if Satan is divided and rises against himself, he cannot stand; his end has come. Indeed, no one can enter a strong man’s house to steal his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man. Then he can plunder his house.
Why are we letting ourselves be tied up with hatred and diviciveness? Surely, we will all lose. We are strong when we weave together all of our differences, differences that have the potential to work synergistically if we open our minds to the idea. Differences provide opportunities to bridge gaps and overcome weaknesses. We become the strong man when we work together. We are strong when we answer hate with love, even when we really really really don't want to. It takes much more strength to respond with love, to act with love, to heal with love than it does with hate.
Our words have power. Our thoughts have power. When you can't muster the strength to love your enemy, find something else to love. Pour love into the world in any way you can, but let's not pour in any more hate or doubt or mistrust. When we are treated unfairly, we still have a choice to redirect our focus on something good, because what we focus on and send out to the world will expand. We can't be fooled into thinking that our hatred is any less powerful or destructive than that of the people we are at odds with. It will hurt the world just as much, whether it is seemingly justified or not. Darkness is darkness no matter what the source. What would happen if we let go of the old paradigm that keeps us trapped in an endless cycle of retribution? What if even one person made a sacrifice of pride and a gift of love in order to pull the weed out of the ground? Just imagine what would grow.
“Lose what needs to be lost to find what needs to be found.”